Thursday, January 21, 2010

23-4 i think

I need to be asking a Dr. about this whole time thing. I think im 23-4 and I have until April 5 at least, but I may be alil off since I am so mentally out of it.
anyway as of now another day down 74 to go. at least... maybe I shouldn't ask a Dr. because even 1 more day to that count is overwhelming...

No infection showing up today and no contraction. oh and I finally got the most amazing nurse to take out my iv! It may be the best thing to happen to me since this started! I can at least sleep now and i dont taste medicine in my mouth all the time. They did however start me on steroid shots to try and speed up the babys lung development, so dont worry im not getting off to easy. I feel like I got punched in the butt, and considering all I do in lay on my butt, well lets just say it blows. Its like being affrraid of your own body with this mess. Every time i feel him move im scared, everytime i pee im scared. im just scared

I got beautiful flowers today from Deon and Erica. so lovely. its amazing how getting a package cheers the entire day up. my first day here my dear friend Shanda sent me flowers when I had only been in the room for about 4 hours. by day 2 Bethany got my a netflix subscription, flowers and birthday balloons from John and Jenn, hair products from Luvi and birthday gifts from Jenny and Tracy(Jimis parents), plus we've had dinner delivered almost every night : ) I feel so blessed to have so much support. most of all thank you all who are taking care of my baby. Angela has been taking her in the day, she sleeps at Lou and Kristens every night, and everyone else has either taken her for a bit this week or has plans to take her soon. I feel like I am half assing it as a mom because im stuck here trying to take care of Embree( should we spell it Embree or Embry?) and cant take care of my daughter who is here now. walking around needing her mama... impossible hard.

4 comments:

  1. Go easy on yourself, Nomes. That beautiful little Luca girl will be fine and probably won't remember a thing about all this when she's older. And my vote is for "Embry." I think. I'm hoping to get a package out to you one of these days!

    Lots of love!

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  2. yeah, you are def. NOT half assing it as a mom! "Embry" needs you too. I'm sure all the new people Luca gets to meet are treating her extra special! Thanks for writing for us! ♥

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  3. Love you, Sister. Praying :-) I totally believe you and little Embry are gonna be fine.

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  4. Embry, definitely:-) i'm praying for you...

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